30.6.09

MacGyver, how do you spell 911?

"Ma, I need a ride home."

Remember domestic phone cards? Back when cell phone companies charged for long distance calls? Back when advertizing "500 national minutes" was a big friggin' deal? My parents are the only people left who still use phone cards for their China calls. Skype is beyond their comprehension. I'm still working on explaining the difference between fax and email. One step at a time.

I miss Richard Dean Anderson's commercials for prepaid phone card, Minute Pass. Why bother using a phone when MacGyver's there? Give him an eraser, a Hershey bar, and a yard of carpet remenant, he'll Bat Signal to Tijuana for you.



Hold up, is that child being kidnapped in the background? That kid does NOT look like he wants to get into the back of the van. Run, child, run! Go into the desert!

26.6.09

Archipelago


Archipelago: Amazing Seattle-based company producing saucy Asian pride apparel. I've admired their work over the years. Months ago, I visited my neighbor, Ferdinand. As our daughters played Littlest Pet Shop in the basement, I spotted a box full of Archipelago t-shirts. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: I love those shirts! I've see their stuff around town. You sure bought a lot. Guess you're a big fan. Hey look, they're still neatly wrapped in packaging.

Ferdinand: Uh, thanks. We made them.

Me: Really?

Ferdinand: My sisters and I created Archipelago.

Me: Wicked! Does this mean I can buy Archipelago stuff online and not pay for shipping and handling?

When you're going through the website, check out the Links under Community. It's a great list of resource.

How friggin' neat is it when you meet people you are suppose to be friends with? Ferdinand and family are very active in the local community. A positive force supporting Asian American development. They are one of my favorite neighbors.

25.6.09

OMG, IT'S RYU!!!


Shinkuu Hadouken
Ryu vs. Ken
FIGHT!


Photo from: Around the Americas. Expedition by a group of bad-asses sailing all around North and South America. Their mission statement:

"Our mission is to build awareness throughout the Americas
of increasing threats to our fragile ocean environment
and to mobilize North and South Americans to
take action to improve the health of our oceans."

If only Chun Li is on the crew, too.

24.6.09

I for one, am thankful we had Jon and Kate


Say what you will about Jon and Kate. She's the devil. Emotionally abusive relationship. Spoiled kids. Still, it was a refreshing and empowering change to see a hapa family on national television. My heart cheers when I see that fun down to earth Asian man who is gettin' some! An Asian man gets to be in a relationship with a strong-willed woman? Sure she's crazy, but at least they are not reinforcing the stereotype of an Asian man with submission Asian wife, breeding a quiet little obedient troop of look alike kids. Oh wait, they do look alike, but quiet they are not.

It's debatable how many steps our society took backwards when Kate proclaims her love for Jon's Asian eyes and her china doll kids. At the very least an Asian man is portrayed as sexually desirable and can even hook up with college hotties. Way to show mainstream our men as the *gasp* studs they are! Thanks Jon and Kate. It's been great.

21.6.09

Cost of Opportunity


My daughter, US born citizen.

Living in the United States is wonderful adventure, but don't forget about the entry fee. Here are a few examples of USCIS fees:


For a legal resident to become a US citizen:

Biometric (fingerprinting): $80

N-400 Application for US Naturalization: $595


Petition for family members to reunite in the United States includes but not limited to:

I-130 Application for Relative Alien: $330

I-485 Application to Register Permanent Residency: $930 ($600/child under 14)

*May also need a work visa while waiting for permanent residency, see below.


Non-immigrant work visa

I-765 Application for Employment Authorization: $340 (Fee charged at every renewal term)


Certain cases such as refugees or crime victims can waive the fees. There are organizations such as the Northwest Immigration Rights Project guiding low-income immigrants through the complex and expensive immigration system. This is a friendly reminder: Don't take your citizenship status for granted.

15.6.09

13.6.09

Flying with Your Best Friend Cross Country

His dog really is his co-pilot.



You have got to be kidding me.


Buy your Mutt Muffs here.

10.6.09

PETA vs. 2010 Vancouver Olympics


Fuck. This is twisted.

PETA is riding on the 2010 Vancouver Olympics' publicity to demand an end to Canadian seal hunting. PETA spoofed the Olympic mascots into a pack of blood thirsty hooligans. I understand what they are trying to do, but is cute satirical cartoon characters really the most effective way to end the unjustice of inhumane hunting practices? Seriously, Badtz-Maru looks more pissed off than the three evil mascots put together. Their website left my jaw hanging. I personally found the site tasteless and unavailing. It left me feeling that this particular PETA committee had so much fun mocking the Olympics that they missed their own agenda of animal rights. Features include:

* Printable COLORING PAGES of murderous Quatchi, bloody wing tipped Sumi, and a zombie-like Miga.
* Clip of evil mascot trio chasing down a baby seal and then standing over the oozing carcass.
* Hockey stick wielding Olympic logo that whacks on a seal when you roll the cursor on the image.
* A link tab titled "More Fun!" to access e-cards, protest photos, stickers, and Kid's Corner.


For people who love animals, they sure spent a lot of time and energy generating violent images. The shock value is suppose to get my attention enough to support their cause. But I am just plain shocked.

9.6.09

Zen Conversation with My Daughter, Episode 2

My daughter and I drove by Seattle’s beautiful Lake Union. A seaplane flew by and we got to talking about how they work. I explained that seaplanes are doubly wicked cool because they can float as a boat AND fly as a plane. She thought for a second, made the connection in her little brain, then said,

“Oh, seaplanes are like my 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner!”

“That’s right, honey. What a great way to think about it.”

What I really wanted to say was. “That's right, baby. Just like you, white mixed with Chinese. 2-in-1, ta-da!” If only she can appreciate how funny a comment that is coming from a biracial child. There will come a time.

8.6.09

Consider Yourselves Warned

I have two lovely daughters. To some old school Asians, that’s a death sentence. I get encouragements on a weekly basis: "Next time. Next time will be a boy.” Or words of acceptance: “That’s okay. Girls are good, too.”


Thanks, but no thanks folks. Your comments are thoughtful and kind, but I can do without them. If I get another gentle look of condolences or one more sigh of pity, I just might open up one big phat Costco-sized can of whoop ass.

3.6.09

Tiananmen Square


6/4 marks the 20th Anniversary of the Tiananmen Square Massacre. I was nine years old and living in Hong Kong. My family was planning a visit to Beijing later that summer, which was subsequently canceled later that month.

I remember waking up in the middle of the night, my parents quietly huddled in front of our small TV. I think my oldest brother was awake as well. They hushed me back to sleep. Told me I shouldn’t watch TV with them and that I had nothing to worry about. The next day at school, we all wore a black arm bands on our sleeve to mourn the dead. We wore them for a month. I didn’t understand what was happening, but a tower of uncertainty and fear loomed over our heads.

We held a moment of silence at the school yard. I remember a classmate telling me that I was supposed to cry at the moment of silence because something very sad happened. People died. I tried to squeeze tears out, but I couldn't. I was too frightened. I remember hearing talks that soldiers can’t be responsible for killings. The people saw inhuman anger in the soldier’s glazed red eyes that can only be explained by the gunpower the troops were fed before marching into the square. Two decades later, I am still as confused as I was in the summer of 1989.